It's time for my mid-life crisis and I have nothing to wear!

I always used to joke (semi-seriously) with my Wife, Sherry that if I had a mid-life crisis I would never buy a sports car, (can't afford one) cheat on her, (there's that whole promise I made to God and to her when we got married) or divorce her, (ditto the promise thing). So instead I would start wearing really loud shirts.

Well, I bought some of those shirts a few years ago (being the daring soul that I am) and now that my mid-life crisis is here, I have nothing to wear!

Here's how I know I'm in the midst of a crisis...

1. I'm tired all of the time
2. I'm angry way too much
3. I'm really getting stressed out
4. My kids don't listen to me
5. My Wife and I never have any time to ourselves
6. I'm having multiple health problems
7. The repair bills on my house and car far outnumber the amount of cash that I have
8. I have more hair on my back and shoulders than I do on my head
9. I'm tired all the time (yes, I know I already wrote that down, but I'm REALLY TIRED!)
10.I've gained too much weight to wear my loud shirts...so what's the use?

So, if you hear me Primal Screaming, or see me tearing out what's left of my hair, or if you happen to notice the twitch in my left eye...don't be too shocked....I'm having a mid-life crisis... oh, and all of you are invited to attend.

David